"The essential minimum for a city is four to five men, except actually it's a whole bunch more, because we need to trade and make war. Because this ideal city is still going to have war."
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| "You're so right, Socrates!" |
"And we're going to have to tell our children stories, so they can get educated. But, the stories we have right now can teach them bad things, so we're going to have to censor the ever living daylights out of them. We're throwing out three fifths of the Iliad, because we can't let any young minds be warped by seeing Achilles misbehaving. Censorship is awesome for this ideal city."
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| "No one will ever doubt your wisdom, Socrates." |
"And it would be aweful if sick people just laid around being sick, or, gods forbidding, procreated. That's just prolonging their worthless miserable lives. So we're just going to leave sick people to die. This ideal city embraces eugenics."
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| "Please give me your babies Socrates." |
"And as for wives, well, friends share everything in common. In this city, women won't just be one persons property, they'll be everyone's property."
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| "You are a beautiful person, Socrates." |
"And we need to make sure people don't go laughing too much. Too much laughter and the next thing you know your children will be running around playing lawless games. Everything in moderation. "
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| "Seriously Socrates, please let me have your babies. Please." |
"And justice? Well, in this ideal city, justice is doing your own work and minding your own business. If the leaders decided you would be a good farmer when you were eight, that's what you're going to be. Forever."
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| "Those 500 Athenians are gonna be super sorry they didn't give you the lead in the spring musical, Socrates." |
"Injustice, on the other hand, is meddling. When people want to do anything besides what's been decided for them, that's just a big piece of injustice."
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| "We love you Socrates!" |
Hi Laura,
ReplyDeleteI greatly enjoyed your post. You had me laughing the entire way through. I think you did a wonderful job satirizing both the style and the content of The Republic.
I do have a question, though: if, somehow, Plato read this post, how would he reply? Would Plato say, "No, no, no, you got it all wrong! This is what I really meant!" In other words, is the satire above a little too simplified?
Finally, since you made me a picture on my post, I returned the favor. This is what I'd picture Plato, Socrates' student, will react to this scenario: http://i49.tinypic.com/20j32fb.png
All I could think about when I was reading his section dealing with the sick and dying was the scene from the movie "Pirates Band of Misfits" where Captain jumps onto a leper/plague ship.
ReplyDelete(the original scene was leper but was changed due to controversy) (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WNjh2dnyLgw)
Can't you just image Plato wanting to build a giant boat and sending all the sick people out to sea.
His ideas on justice seemed a little strange to me because we live in a "just" society yet everyone is constantly meddling in each other's business so I guess we aren't so just?
The laughing part of socrates rules still baffles me. I wonder what the punishment for that would be? It's said that laughing alot makes you live longer, so I guess that is why Socrates is no longer here!maybe he should rethink that idea. Anyway his definition of justice and injustice are right sccording to how he designed his city, but wrong in terms of the bigger picture, (a broad context) because it just does not make sense.
ReplyDeleteWhere did you find these pictures? they are absolutely hilarious
ReplyDeleteI drew them in MS Paint, because I'm a Hardworking Student (TM).
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